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The need to be compliant and polite in the presence of any and every Dom. The edge off of that insatiable and damn near uncontrollable need. There weren’t many who could handle living without a Dom, because unlike many subs are led to believe, suppressants aren't fucking fool proof. That’s all it ever was for submissives though a shot. When the time came to go out and secure a decent job, buy a house in a nice neighborhood, or take a shot at living alone and enjoying a Dominant-free life neutrals received all of the benefits. It had its perks, for sure, like allowing someone to be perceived as a neutral and the advantages neutrals had over submissives in everyday life was very clear. The fact of the matter was simple- taking suppressants wasn’t fool proof.
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It’s comforting in a toxic way, to know that despite the closing of our story, I will truly never lose these parts of you. A sense of desolation wrapping around me, but no longer suffocating. Like I had just hung the Stars in your sky, given you the very reason the admire the darkness surrounding you, and you’d given me the very moon I sit and look at tonight. i do not condone nor suggest these types of relationships.
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Louis is a love-brainwashed-teenager of hope drenched in dreams, clad in oversized clothes damaged with holes, and standing waist-high in novels.